5 Reasons Why You Must Never Give Up
When you’re faced with difficulties and life seems like one big challenge, it’s easy to want to give up. But I’m here to tell you that ‘you must never give up.’ You may ask, “Who are you to make such a bold statement?” Well, I’m a woman who’s been to hell and back emotionally and physically.
If anyone should have given up, it should have been me.
These are just some of the reasons why I could have easily given up:
- I was married and suffered domestic violence, beaten, cheated on, nearly strangled and mentally abused. When things got to the point where crying and depression became a normal part of my everyday life, and I even hated myself, I thought about suicide.
- After my dad, ex-husband and new-born grandson died within the space of nine months, I thought I was going to die from the grief. It was too much to bear at times. I cried so much. My eyes felt like they would run out of tears. But God gave me the strength to cope.
I nearly died on three separate occasions. But I give God thanks and praise because He spared my life.
I believe God wants to use me to encourage other women, by sharing my testimonies and life experiences.
As I write this article, I can feel His love comforting my heart. That’s because the painful memories still bring tears to my eyes. My inner healing is an ongoing process.
1. Never give up because someone else is depending on you
When I was married, my husband and I argued mostly every day. The arguments included nasty name callings. When he was angry, he slapped or punched me. One day he slapped me with such force that it knocked me to the ground. The scary thing was that I was carrying our baby in my arms at the time.
My life was a big distressed mess. There were many times when I wanted to end it all. I just wanted the arguments and violence to stop. But when I looked at my baby and her two sisters, I didn’t have the heart to do it. If I died, who will look after them? My children needed me.
My daughters had suffered enough from seeing fights, and listening to the constant arguments. None of it was their fault. I couldn’t make them suffer any more by taking my life. You can’t replace the love of a mother. I grew up without my mum and dad. And no one can replace the lost years I spent without them.
You depend on God for strength. And your children depend on you for love, protection and support, regardless of the battles you’re going through.
2. You can learn from your mistakes
Every mistake you make that brings pain or heartache is a lesson. God wants you to learn from them. Do you know why? So that you can correct your mistakes! After you’ve done that you’ll do the right thing next time, hopefully. And you’ll want to try harder so that you don’t make the same mistake again.
Correcting your mistakes helps you to grow as a person. Reflecting on the hurt and pain, should help you to change the situation that caused it. If you can’t do it by yourself, get help.
One of my biggest mistakes was jumping from one abusive relationship to another. I suffered a lot because of my dependency on men. It took a lot for me learn.
The day I decided to stay single and sort out my life, was the beginning of my learning journey. It felt like someone had removed a veil from over my eyes. It’s been an empowering experience.
3. If you give up, you’ll have nothing to show for the lessons you learned from persevering
I always say that life is one big lesson. You can choose to learn from it or just ride the tides. But if just ride the tides; you’ll surely get bounced around like the waves. And if you get bounced around, you’ll probably end up going around in circles and not know when to break the cycle.
When I was in relationships, I couldn’t imagine me being a single woman. But it came to a point when I had to quit. It’s not been easy, especially as I’m also a single mother.
What do you do when you have no money to look after your children, stressed from all the bills landing through the letterbox and distressed from creditors knocking at your door? You either sink or swim.
I kept pushing myself. I have always had goals. Those goals were to improve life for me and my daughters.
I eventually went from being a cleaner, to a mature university student. After that, I qualified as a teacher.
If I didn’t persevere, I wouldn’t have achieved that qualification. And I’ve done much, much more as a single woman and mother.
It says in the bible, “Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance.” Romans 5: 3 (NIV)
4. Challenges and trials of life will make you a stronger person
I knew a lady who lost her fiancé in World War 2. She was 18 and deeply in love. His death broke her heart. She couldn’t bear the thought of marrying anyone else, so she stayed single all her life. She even died a virgin.
When she was in her 50’s her parents became ill. She gave up her job to care for them. Shortly after they died, she developed heart and kidney problems. She was in and out of hospital. She carried on despite all the health challenges she faced.
That lady made a successful life for herself. She travelled the world and lived a good life. She was an extremely strong woman, and a dedicated Christian.
When she was alive she inspired me. I learnt a lot from her. She lived alone and cared for herself until she died at the age of 82.
When the challenges of life overwhelm you, put your trust in God. He will see you through. He said, “My strength is made perfect in your weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9
God will never give you more than you can bear. Stay focused and be determined to overcome your trials. And you will, because nothing stays the same.
5. Use your bad experiences as testimonies to help other women
When you share your bad experiences, it will help someone else. They can be encouraged by what you went through. It won’t necessarily stop them from experiencing it, but because you’ve come through it, it will give them hope.
Every problem that we face in life has been experienced by someone in the past. And will be experienced by someone else in the future.
Whenever I listen to someone else’s story, it inspires me. Sometimes we think our problems are bad, until we hear what others are going through.
I lived with domestic violence, but came out alive. Some women were not that fortunate and were killed by their partners.
One of the most painful experiences is losing your child. My daughter did. But do you know something? She is one of the strongest young woman I know. She’s an inspiration to her friends. When people listen to her story, they’re amazed by what she went through. Yet, she is always smiling.
God restored her broken, battered heart. If he did it for her, he can do it for you. No matter what you’re going through, never give up. Life is not a bed of roses, but it’s full of beautiful flowers. You just need to look for them.
God will see you through anything you’re facing. Just trust Him, pray and ask Him to comfort you. He will. He is always with you. He said, “Never will I leave you. Nor will I forsake you.”
What do you do when you feel like giving up? How do you cope with challenges?